As we approach the end of one year and embark upon the journey to the new year, it is a great time to reflect on all the events of the past twelve months. There is no doubt that in this past year, just as any year, we were met with challenges and opportunities, great joy, along with great sadness. There were times of peace and balance, as well as times of turmoil and uncertainty. In all of it, there was knowledge gained, perspectives broadened, and hopefully, an increased appreciation for all surrounding us. As with all experiences, both good and bad, it is not the experiences themselves that matter but what you do with the lessons learned from them.
One of my greatest sources of sadness in over thirty years of law enforcement has been standing by as a witness to so many struggles and hardships that result from unhealthy choices. It is easy for any of us to look at those in struggle and just say, “Make Better Choices,” but the reality is not that easy. So much of who we are is due largely to those influences that surrounded us throughout our lives, and until we can place ourselves in the shoes of another, any judgment is misplaced. Change is never easy regardless of where you are starting that change from, and moving forward from any current state of existence is never easy.
A great lesson in this very struggle is one that we all learned at a young age. It came from a simple piece of playground equipment: the monkey bars. As we all waited in line for our turn, we took notice of those who went before us. What worked for them? How did they get across? Where did they go wrong?
When it was our turn, we grabbed a hold of that first bar. Nothing else really mattered at that point other than holding our weight and being stable in that current state. Just as in life, before we can ever move forward, we must be stable in where we are. Then, the next big decision: moving forward. This required us to maintain the grip we had on the current bar with one hand while being willing to grab hold of the next bar. For a moment, we find ourselves at a place where we both hold on to what we know while grasping onto where we want to be. Now the big challenge; letting go of the comfort of where we are and what we know, to the uncertainty of change. Just like on the bars, you cannot hang onto both for very long. You are either moving forward or stuck at your current reality. Just as on the playground, many are watching us as we work our way through the journey. Some shout out encouragement and support, while others try to create doubt in our minds about our ability to reach our goals. The most amazing part of watching kids on the monkey bars for the first time is the confidence in completing that journey. After that, a goal that once seemed daunting to them was now able to be conquered. This is a lesson that we, as adults, should never forget. No matter how old we are, there is always doubt and uncertainty. Be willing to lean into that uncertainty, grab a hold of what is next, and find joy in the small victories. Just remember to give yourself a little grace for those shortcomings, as they are as much a part of you as your successes. We are not defined by the fall but by how we get back up and continue the journey.
