In my quest to submerge myself in a new book as frequently as possible, my most recent find and current read is “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a #@%!” by Mark Manson.
The title of the book piqued my curiosity, and I must admit that I had to struggle through the first few chapters, which contained more vulgarity than I usually like to subject myself to. However, once past that initial obstacle, it began to gain momentum.
Although I am not yet finished with this book, it's safe to say that its message is not that we shouldn’t care about things or people. The premise is that we tend to give away our attention and focus on things that really don’t matter, while doing so, we neglect those things in our lives that truly matter. It’s not that we mean to divert our attention to the less important; it's more that those secondary issues are always present, resulting in a slow, creeping preoccupation with the petty things of life.
There is also a prominent trend of giving way too much of a #@%! On things that are outside our control. This too is an unfortunate expenditure of our valuable attention and effort, which many times leaves us both frustrated and exhausted. Again, there is nothing wrong with being passionate about an issue or topic; we just need to bring it back to a reality of what we can actually control and then focus our efforts in that realm.
The other takeaway that honestly struck me was a chapter titled “Happiness is a Problem”. As most of you know, I am generally a very happy person, and have always felt that happiness was something to strive for. Again, I was challenged to read further. In the end, it wasn’t stating that happiness was bad; it was merely stating that most aren’t willing to succumb to the struggle and pain that brings about the existence of, and appreciation for, happiness. People tend to want the end results without the journey. We often see this in our culture, where people compare their lives to those of others, unaware of the pain or suffering that person endured to achieve their current state. The theme ultimately is not to focus on an end state of happiness, but to enjoy the struggles and challenges along the way that are the foundation of true and sustained happiness.
Bringing this back to our personal lives, I would submit that our own lives and the challenges we face give us each a unique perspective as we interact with those caught in their own struggle of giving way too much of a #@%! In things that are either insignificant or outside of their control. We are given the gift of perspective through struggle, and we should strive to apply the lessons of resiliency, optimism, and courage in our own lives, lest we fall victim to the same effects of anxiety, frustration, and fear.
